Caring for Crohn's & UC

Health Activists Writer’s Month Challenge Day 9

April 9, 2013 at 2:03 pm Rebecca K. 1 comment

I am WAY behind in this challenge so I will be playing catch up in the next few posts but I wanted to begin by responding to today’s prompt.

As a parent with health conditions or parent to a child(ren) with health conditions, what do you hope you’re doing right?

I need to begin this response by saying that I am neither a parent with a health condition nor the parent to a child with it. I am the wife to a spouse with Crohn’s disease. Being his caregiver is a full-time job in addition to my actual full-time job.

Being a caregiver isn’t easy- it means putting the needs of your significant other or child before your own. It means dropping what you are doing to help them, whether it means going to a doctor’s appointment with them and going to work late or getting woken up at 3 A.M. to go to the emergency room. It means keeping track of someone else’s schedule in addition to your own. It means, sometimes, cooking special food targeted to your loved one’s dietary needs which differ from your own.

So what do I hope I’m doing right? I hope I am advocating for his best interests when it comes to treatment the right way.

As someone with a very outgoing, sometimes abrasive, personality, it’s easy for me to stand up for my husband when it comes to his treatment. I’m not afraid to ask questions at his doctor’s appointments to make sure he is getting the best care possible. I’m not afraid to annoy the nurses while he is hospitalized if he needs something and hasn’t received it.

Sometimes, I feel like I am overdoing it by not allowing him to have his own voice. I try very hard to make sure there is a balance in which Dan is able to advocate for himself and discuss his concerns and I can voice my concerns. However, there are definitely times where I am overpowering and Dan definitely just defers to me. His doctor often laughs at me because I’ll answer her questions before he can. I can also recite the dates of his hospitalizations, surgery, when he was diagnosed, and when he started Remicade by heart and respond to those inquiries without skipping a beat.

While I may be overdoing it, it’s just out of love. As a caregiver, I want to make sure Dan is receiving the best treatment possible. If I come off as intense or rude, I’m sorry but that’s just who I am and how I get things done.

Entry filed under: Advocates, Caregiving, General.